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Losing friends every minute

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I feel really heartbroken that a woman who once splurged on facebook that her husband has left her because he took acid and had a bad trip and now believed she was now out to get him has unfriended me.  She has a cool dog though.  Once time I took it to Lidl and pretended I was blind because I couldnt be bothered tying it up outside the shop.  But thats another story.

 

The Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome (AIDS) was first recognised as a clinical entity in 1981 in the United States,(1) and although the majority of cases even today have been reported from the United States,(2) the Western scientific community has convinced the world that it is primarily an African disease and an African problem. To explain how a disease originating in one continent was yet disseminated to the rest of the world from another, the scientists have argued that there was a remote central African "lost tribe" in whom the virus had been present for centuries,(3) or alternatively who acquired the infection from monkeys 30 or so years ago.(4) Haitians (but no-one else) working in central Africa then became infected (presumably heterosexually) and, on returning home, spread the disease to homosexual American tourists.(5,6,pp.17-20) By this circuitous route the virus reached the United States and from there spread to the rest of the world.

Funding Fail

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My cat got run over… it was ok though cause that cat is harder than a coffin nail, it cost me a fuck ton to get him fixed though which was pretty gay (no homo).

I made this indiegogo page and no-one gave a fuck, bunch of twats. I heard the best way to get people to donate is to build rapport and force them to empathise. That’s why I used gizoogle translate, so I could communicate more effectively with the proletariat.

Didn’t work.

https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/help-save-satan

HELP--Save-Satan---Indiegogo

Redesign

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I’d like to take a few minutes to walk YOU our fans through the changes you’ve no doubt noticed. We decided to update our design with a fresh new look to revitalise our brand and push things forward.

The new look is based roughly on the “twenty fourteen” theme available as the default in WordPress, it has been modified heavily to suit our needs.

First of all, it has our cool, funky, fresh nuclear warning logo plastered obnoxiously across the top in the header.

redesign1

Being media types from media backgrounds, we especially understand the importance of BRAND IDENTITY. This is why the logo repeats itself. Remember if you want to make it far in business, in business, in business, you need to remember if you want to make it far in business you need to remember the three Rs:  Repetitions, Reptiles, and Rapes.

Next of all, its RESPONSIVE, which also begins with R, and is important these days, because everyone is pretty much viewing your website on an ipod like this:
redesign2
So it responds to the TILT of your device. This is a PRO feature of wordpress which we paid serious $$$ for. You can’t just get this shit anywhere and expect it to be as good as ours.

Yeah so anyway, we basically fucking smash the fuck out of the creative digital web-o-sphere-grlobe. If you’d like to see more of our award winning design work check out these sites:

http://neuronproaudio.co.uk/
http://toastyghost.co.uk/

Gingers

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I found a small film crew looking for people to join it in the Manchester area.  I asked to apply, and after some emails found their youtube channel.  So I may or may not be making such classics as this….

Secret Santa

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Finally gotten around to decorating my secret santa gift for the somethingawful secret santa.  Here’s one of the sides of the box.'gook' is the best racial slur next to 'negress'

High Five!

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HIGH FIVE... SCUBA DIVE

The funny part is that they all don’t know who to high five with, not the girl in the background’s mouth you sicko.

Oscar winning moments of film

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That scene in Tom Sizemores sex tape where mid fuck he turns to the hooker he’s flopping around on top of and asks..

“what day is it? ”

And she says

” thursday”

And he states directly into the camera and replies,

“I hope 27 cops died today.  And i hope they had a lot of kids. ”

image

THE FUTURE

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whv92BPI’m telling you in 2060 you won’t be able to walk down the street without witnessing someone fucking a car or something.